Drill into his head and put him to bed

The Lobotomization of Donald T

(With my apologies to  Robert Service's poem: "The Cremation of Sam McGee")

There are strange things done in the midnight sun

by the men who search for gold;

The Washington trails have their secret tales

That could make your blood run cold;

The neon lights have seen strange sights,

But the strangest they ever did see,

Was that night on the mall when out went the call:

To Lobotomize Donald T

Come watch as we drill, it'll be such a thrill,

He needs two more holes in his head.

One on the left and one on the right,

Then off with him - back to his bed.

Lobotomies work well, but how can you tell

With a patient like Donald T?

He howls like hell and shows he's not well

We'll just blame the Lobotomy!